Hopefully this will help someone who may have experienced the same thing.
I have had three miscarriages. The first was a missed miscarriage at 10 weeks, the second a chemical pregnancy, the third a natural miscarriage at 5 weeks.
Before I found out for sure that I had lost the third pregnancy, I truly believed (about half the time) that it was all a mistake and I'd have my baby. I went on a crazy roller coaster ride -- it is a miscarriage, it's not, take a pregnancy test, the line is lighter, it must be a miscarriage, wave of nausea, no, I'm still pregnant. It was a mess. Then the dr. told me for sure that I had miscarried . . . This was about a month ago.
BUT I still go through periods of time when I am SURE I am still pregnant. They don't last long, and I reason through them -- the pregnancy tests are completely negative, I've had a cycle already, I don't really "feel" pregnant -- but I STILL have flashes of "I just think I'm still pregnant." "Maybe all the tests are wrong."
OK, so these are probably moments of classic denial (even though I am coping with this one pretty well), but I mean, I am totally convinced for a little while. This didn't happen with my 3 other losses, so it seems strange to me.
In case anyone else has gone through this, I wanted to let you know you're not the only one.
Hi Amelia -
Thanks for posting this. I definitely went through the same moments, with my miscarriage...I would even "forget" that I had had a miscarriage, and start thinking about the baby coming. Cruel moments of realization, but I guess they're natural/normal. I'm so sorry to hear about your losses, and I wish you all the best with your next pregnancy!
Me (34) DH (35)
TTC #2 since June 2010
December 26, 2010 @ 7 weeks
I completely understand how you feel. I had a D&C for a missed m/c and keep wondering if my baby would have made it if I'd waited longer. I know logically that the baby wasn't growing, but in my heart, I always think about what might have been. It's especially worse now that my due date is approaching. Hugs! It will get better for all of us.
IUI #1 10/19/10, BFP 10/31/10, 7 weeks, D&C 12/13/2010, Repeat D&C 1/21/2011, methotrexate shot #1 3/2/2011, methotrexate shot #2 3/18/2011, hemorrhage 4/6/2011, mri 4/29/2011, methotrexate shot #3 5/6/2011, methotrexate shot #4 5/27/2011, HCG finally below 2 6/21/2011